I Have a Bone to Pick!

That's kind of a funny saying, isn't it?!? I mean, what does picking bones have to do with discussing an issue you have with someone? 

Okay, back to the real reason for this post......

I don't know about anyone else but I tend to walk fast.  I don't run or necessarily speed walk, I just walk at a swift pace.  My mom and dad both are fast walkers so I learned quickly to walk fast or get left behind (not really, they would have waited for me but it made it sound a lot more dramatic). 

As I got older my mom taught me the valuable shopping lesson of walking fast to cover as much retail square footage as physically possible during an allotted period of time.  This would prove very valuable when I entered the adult working world in which people are only given an hour lunch break.  Seriously, who actually eats lunch these days.....j/k!!!!

Yesterday was no different.  I had a lot of square footage to cover in a short period of time if I was going to accomplish everything on my list.  Of course all the stores were at opposite ends of the mall from each other.  So I parked at Von Maur and got right down to business.

I picked out and tried on the shoes that were of interest to me.  Once I made my final decision I politely asked the lady to hold the shoes for me.  LESSON #1- Don't carry unnecessary baggage if possible, it will only slow you down.  If you can have them hold it.....do that! I knew that I would be walking by the shoe department on my way out.

I left Von Maur and ventured out to the dreaded mall area.  I was immediately in shopping hell! I was constantly getting stuck walking behind people who obviously had no where of any importance to be*.  These people not only took their sweet time but they also veered all over the place like a bunch of drunks.  Passing them was impossible.  Every time I tried to make my move the slow poke would cut me off.  People who know me know that I am not a patient person! God must have skipped over me when He was handing out patience!  I cannot stand walking behind people who saunter at a snails pace.  I have places to be people!!!! So move over and get the hell out of my way!  It's not that hard!  You don't have to take up the entire aisle way of the mall!

My other shopping pet peeve is parents who just let their kids run like wild banshees.  I am not talking about the kids who are with their parents and maybe don't keep up or walk a little ahead.  I am talking about parents who sit on the benches, watch as their kids wreak havoc clear across the mall and laugh thinking it is so cute.  It's not cute!   To these parents- I will plow your child over if they get in my way because you don't know how to control your kid in public.  Okay, maybe not plow over but I won't be happy and will probably give you a VERY dirty look and possibly say something!  I had one kid who darted in front of me and another who ran into me.  I about face planted twice thanks to these two little brats (maybe 5 or 6 years old).  Where were the parents?!? Oh, half way down the mall in another store clueless as to their kids whereabouts! Great parenting job!

So ladies and gentlemen, that is why I was unable to accomplish everything on my shopping list yesterday.  Don't worry, I will get over it (actually, I am already over it).

Phew! Okay, I am done with my rant! If you are still reading, thank you for listening!

* - I have nothing against people who walk at a slow pace.....just people who walk at a slow place and don't allow others to pass them.

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Comments

I'm totally the same way and just want to get where I want to go quickly (you would fit right in in NYC!)
B said…
Like you, I am a very fast walker. People tell me ALL the time. But walking on the WRONG side of the mall is one of my biggest shopping pet peeves. It's annoying and RUDE! I'm sorry you had to deal with such ignorant people. Ha! :)
Omg I am such a fast walker... everywhere I go... and I get so annoyed with sunday walkers (sorta like sunday drivers) who take their sweet time whenever they are trying to go somewhere. It's okay when people walk slow, but not when they take up the whole aisle or hallway or a large space!
I am so giving you my kids to go shopping!!! It will prepare you for motherhood, when you get nothing on your list done.
Chocolate Lover said…
That is precisely why I avoid malls at all costs on the weekend! Its nuts trying to get anything done.
Lyryn said…
HAHA! Came across your blog and have really like reading it. I'm a fast walker when I'm not preggo... I look forward to reading more of you!

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